I should have reviewed this right after seeing it to warn the world against viewing it, but now that I've had time (a lot of time) to cool off and reflect on it, I will be slightly kinder in my analysis.
This movie was a cake made either by a novice baker or someone who forgot to put their reading glasses on when looking over the ingredient list. Character arcs that could and should have been compelling and relatable fell flat, replaced before the 30-minute mark by heavily cliched body-snatching, shape-shifting aliens. I wish that were only a joke.
And speaking of jokes, Dark Phoenix falls far below even the widely disliked Apocalypse because it's almost totally joyless. Apocalypse was by few means a great movie, but the filmmakers at least seem to have recognized that, throwing in a cheeky self-referential joke or two about its failure to live up to its two awe-inspiring predecessors (see "The third one's always the worst"). Dark Phoenix, on the other hand, seems to think itself well-done, taking itself more seriously than even most good movies should.
Additionally, it fails to resonate on an emotional level, perhaps because of the way it sets up, proceeds to ignore for most of the film, and hastily does a shoddy job of resolving the aforementioned character arcs. It started off good, but all I felt watching the final two-thirds of this movie was a profound sense of utter disappointment.
The previous X-Men movies have been known for handling complex real-world issues: most notably discrimination, but also trying to help a friend engaging in self-destructive behaviors, the extent of humankind's ability to influence the future, drug addiction, etc., etc. I could go on for ages. Dark Phoenix makes little attempt to strike a thematic chord throughout most of the movie, and tries perhaps too hard at the beginning and end. The metaphorical cake was quite under-mixed in this regard. The trouble is, I like X-Men so much - better than Avengers (sorry, Avengers) - partially because it's so socially conscious, but with all the jacked-up stuff going on in our world today, this installment failed to really address any of it.
Dark Phoenix's primary saving grace was its brilliant, star-studded cast, except that the cast failed to save it. Let that be a lesson for the ages: you can have great actors and actresses, some truly great predecessors, decent special effects and action sequences, and an overblown Hollywood budget, but if the script is terrible, you're toast. (Totally random fun fact: this particular slang usage of the word "toast" actually originated from the original Ghostbusters, a much better movie that definitively hits the mark when it comes to having a sense of fun.)
One review from salon.com states that Dark Phoenix only really has value as a teaching tool for aspiring and novice filmmakers of what not to do. I think that's an accurate analysis. I spent the drive home from the theatre thinking that I could have made a better movie than that, which is a testament to the sad failure it is. I had high hopes, I really did. All the ingredients were at hand, but some got wasted, some were forgotten, and some new ones were added. The aliens were like adding paprika to the cake. Some people might like it, but um...
Yeah, just um. I've given you all of my takeaways. Hope to blog again soon - before next July.
This movie was a cake made either by a novice baker or someone who forgot to put their reading glasses on when looking over the ingredient list. Character arcs that could and should have been compelling and relatable fell flat, replaced before the 30-minute mark by heavily cliched body-snatching, shape-shifting aliens. I wish that were only a joke.
And speaking of jokes, Dark Phoenix falls far below even the widely disliked Apocalypse because it's almost totally joyless. Apocalypse was by few means a great movie, but the filmmakers at least seem to have recognized that, throwing in a cheeky self-referential joke or two about its failure to live up to its two awe-inspiring predecessors (see "The third one's always the worst"). Dark Phoenix, on the other hand, seems to think itself well-done, taking itself more seriously than even most good movies should.
Additionally, it fails to resonate on an emotional level, perhaps because of the way it sets up, proceeds to ignore for most of the film, and hastily does a shoddy job of resolving the aforementioned character arcs. It started off good, but all I felt watching the final two-thirds of this movie was a profound sense of utter disappointment.
The previous X-Men movies have been known for handling complex real-world issues: most notably discrimination, but also trying to help a friend engaging in self-destructive behaviors, the extent of humankind's ability to influence the future, drug addiction, etc., etc. I could go on for ages. Dark Phoenix makes little attempt to strike a thematic chord throughout most of the movie, and tries perhaps too hard at the beginning and end. The metaphorical cake was quite under-mixed in this regard. The trouble is, I like X-Men so much - better than Avengers (sorry, Avengers) - partially because it's so socially conscious, but with all the jacked-up stuff going on in our world today, this installment failed to really address any of it.
Dark Phoenix's primary saving grace was its brilliant, star-studded cast, except that the cast failed to save it. Let that be a lesson for the ages: you can have great actors and actresses, some truly great predecessors, decent special effects and action sequences, and an overblown Hollywood budget, but if the script is terrible, you're toast. (Totally random fun fact: this particular slang usage of the word "toast" actually originated from the original Ghostbusters, a much better movie that definitively hits the mark when it comes to having a sense of fun.)
One review from salon.com states that Dark Phoenix only really has value as a teaching tool for aspiring and novice filmmakers of what not to do. I think that's an accurate analysis. I spent the drive home from the theatre thinking that I could have made a better movie than that, which is a testament to the sad failure it is. I had high hopes, I really did. All the ingredients were at hand, but some got wasted, some were forgotten, and some new ones were added. The aliens were like adding paprika to the cake. Some people might like it, but um...
Yeah, just um. I've given you all of my takeaways. Hope to blog again soon - before next July.
